Friday, December 19, 2008

Tradition

With Christmas less than a week away I have been thinking a lot about tradition and how it serves as an important anchor in our lives. I did a quick search on the Internet to see what came up and found a lot of stuck-in-the-past commentary, not at all what I was looking for. Then I found, "Tradition is a succession of highly developed and deep insights into human nature, which transfers wisdom of ages from generation to generation."

Well, ok, again not exactly what I was looking for but it explains why my Grandmother's lemon bread is the best in the world, and why consequently I am baking several loaves of it to give as gifts, just as my mother used to do, and probably still would do if she had not created a new tradition of lying on the beach in St. Martin at Christmas! (Hi, Mom, I know your Blackberry works on the beach and, yes, I wish it were 80 degrees here too!).

What I like so much about tradition is that it gives us a sense of belonging and security, some continuity in this ever changing world, and a vehicle for remembering. As a child my favorite traditions centered around the Christmas tree and all the ornaments my family collected over the years. The ones I remember the best are the hand made ones...the soap glitter lump that I made in kindergarten and my mother kept until it disintegrated into nothing, the tiny cloth elf that was my grandmother's that I loved to hide in the branches, the shellacked hand painted cookies my mother and I made when I was in the third or fourth grade. Each ornament carried with it a memory.

I am so excited about creating memories with our children, passing on old and starting new traditions. Here are a few that we plan to carry on:

1. The first year we lived in CT we drove to a Christmas Tree farm and strolled around the fields until we found the perfect tree to cut down. We were surprised to find families hanging out by their cars, cooking food and making a day of it. Kind of like the "G" rated version of a tailgating party! It was a fun day, in spite of the cold and our fear that the tree was going to blow off the top of the car on our way home. We have gone the easier route of buying a tree at Stew Leonard's the past few years but Mark has been asking and would very much like to resurrect this tradition so I'm making it number one! Merry Christmas, Honey! LOL

2. We will make hand made ornaments to adorn our tree and maybe some other hand made gifts. I did this with my mother and have been doing this myself for the past few years and can't wait to have little hands to help me.

3. Food is a big part of any tradition and I have fond memories of baking with my mother. I can't wait to cook Grams' lemon bread and Grammy B's fig bars with the kids! (Of course when they are babies they only get to lick the spoon...and only if the batter doesn't contain raw eggs...sheesh!)

4. Christmas is a great time to practice generosity. I usually participate in a local coat drive and the Winter Wishes program.
http://www.nycares.org/volunteer/annual_events/winter_wishes/index.php.

5. My father got us watching The Christmas Story every year, which is a great holiday tradition. Mark's personal favorite is Elf with Will Farrell. He watches it multiple times every year!

6. When I was a child we listened to a lot of Willy Nelson Christmas music...sorry, Mom, but I might have to retire that one! I do really love the old Bing Crosby songs and we were singing "Baby It's Cold Outside" even before Elf became our favorite Christmas movie.

7. When the children are older we will go into the city to see the tree at Rockefeller Center, look at the window displays and take in other festivities that only NYC can offer. We will definitely hit the Garment District for supplies for our hand crafted ornaments and gifts!

8. We will teach the children about what Christmas is like in Ethiopia. I have learned a little about this on the Internet but I will save that for another post.

And of course we will continue the tradition of spending time with family and friends! I hope everyone is enjoying their own personal favorite holiday traditions and if you have any that are particularly noteworthy please leave a comment and tell us about it.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

WE'RE ON THE WAIT LIST!!!!

Christmas has come early to our home with the news that we are officially on the wait list! The last few steps flew by so quickly that we didn't even have a chance to share the good news! First USCIS approved our application after only 12 days after receiving our home study, a true miracle and I almost hate to post this because I know some people wait months. Then we had this last document notarized and sent off for final authentication, another step that we expected to take at least a couple weeks but we only had to wait 5 days! So as of last Thursday our dossier is complete, we are officially on the wait list, and our agency can now start the process of matching us with our future children. WOW!

Yes, I did say children, as in more than one. We have decided that we will wait whatever time it takes to match us with a sibling pair. After all, it has already been 5 months, 4 weeks and 1 day since we decided to adopt (not that I'm counting...), and it will be another several months before we are through with this process, so what's an extra couple months? Our agency is working to match us with either twins ages 0 - 12 months, or a sibling pair with one child 0 - 12 months and the second child up to 2 1/2 years old at time of referral. We are leaving things open on gender since we would be happy with either...or both!

Our agency is still saying that referral times are averaging 4 to 6 months. Although we are hoping for the best, we are taking those time frames with a grain of salt. The local CT friends that we met through our agency have been waiting 6 full months for referrals lately and some even as long as 8 months for siblings. Also, once we get our referral we will have to wait for a court date, then pass court (hopefully the first time) and then travel to bring them home. This means that another three to six months could pass between referral and homecoming. As you can see, we still have a long way to go but we are overjoyed to finally be officially in line! Hooray!!!